Teaching Emotional Intelligence in Early Childhood: Building Emotional and Social Skills for Life
Author: Vanessa Rooney
Vanessa is an Australian LDS lifestyle blogger. Landed in Salt Lake City, Utah, from the sun kissed beaches of Bondi, Australia, Vanessa is a wife and mother of three children.
Teaching emotional intelligence is a crucial part of positive parenting and in early childhood lays a solid foundation for children’s emotional and social development. The ability to recognize and manage their own emotions, understand the feelings of others, and respond thoughtfully to social situations is essential for young children.
These skills, known as emotional intelligence (EQ), play a crucial role in mental health, academic success, and positive relationships. This article will explore the importance of teaching emotional intelligence in early childhood and provide practical strategies to help children develop essential skills like emotional awareness, empathy, and self-regulation.
The Importance of Teaching Emotional Intelligence in Early Childhood
Emotional intelligence is more than just understanding feelings; it’s a powerful tool that affects a child’s ability to communicate effectively, build healthy relationships, and navigate life’s ups and downs.
Salovey & Mayer, pioneers in the theory of emotional intelligence, describe it as “the capacity to recognize our own feelings and those of others, to motivate ourselves, and to manage emotions well in ourselves and in our relationships.”
Teaching emotional intelligence in early childhood helps children develop social skills, empathy, and emotional competence, which are vital for building positive relationships and achieving success throughout life.
Reflective Question
How do you currently support your child or students in recognizing and expressing their emotions?
Core Emotional Intelligence Skills in Early Childhood Development
Our thoughts affect how we feel about things and ourselves. The Savior says, “Look unto me in every thought” (Doctrine and Covenants 6:36).
1. Emotional Awareness
Understanding Own Emotions
Teaching children to recognize their own emotions is the first step in developing emotional intelligence. Help them identify different emotions like happiness, sadness, anger, or fear. A “mood meter” can be a useful tool, helping children label their emotions visually.
You may want to download our free emotional awareness workbook for kids.
Recognizing Emotions in Others
Encourage young children to observe facial expressions and body language to understand the emotions of others. Simple questions like, “How do you think your friend feels?” can build emotional awareness and empathy.
Reflective Question
In what ways can you help children recognize and name their emotions each day?
2. Emotional Regulation
Managing Emotions in a Healthy Way
Teach children to handle negative emotions through techniques like deep breathing and positive self-talk. For example, when children feel upset, encourage them to take “deep breaths” to calm down. Practicing self-regulation at a young age promotes resilience and better mental health. Here are a few methods to try with your child to help them handle their emotions.
1. Take Deep Breaths
Deep breathing is one of the simplest and most effective ways to calm down. Teach kids to take slow, deep breaths, counting to three on each inhale and exhale. This helps them feel grounded and in control.
2. Label the Emotion
Encourage kids to identify and name their emotions, such as anger, sadness, or frustration. Labeling emotions helps children better understand what they’re feeling and makes it easier for them to manage their reactions. In our free emotional regulation worksheet it also prompts children to identify where they are feeling the emotion in their bodies.
3. Use Positive Self-Talk
Teach children to replace negative thoughts with positive self-talk. For example, if they feel frustrated, they can remind themselves, “It’s okay to feel this way. I can handle it.” Positive affirmations help shift their mindset and reduce stress.
4. Draw or Color It Out
Expressing emotions through art can be therapeutic. Kids can draw, color, or paint their feelings. This creative outlet allows them to release emotions in a safe, constructive way.
5. Move Their Body
Physical activity, like jumping, running, or dancing, helps release built-up tension and stress. Encourage kids to do a quick physical activity when they feel overwhelmed. Exercise is a healthy way to let go of negative energy.
6. Practice Mindfulness
Simple mindfulness exercises, such as focusing on one’s breath or paying attention to sensory experiences, can help kids calm down and stay present. Teaching mindfulness can be as easy as having them close their eyes and listen to the sounds around them.
7. Talk About It
Encourage kids to talk about their feelings with a trusted adult or friend. Sharing emotions can be very relieving and helps them feel understood. Remind them that it’s okay to ask for help and express what’s on their mind.
8. Create a “Calm-Down” Space
Designate a special area where kids can go to relax and process their emotions. This space could include comfortable pillows, books, coloring supplies, or soft music. Having a designated spot can help them recognize when it’s time to cool off and focus on self-soothing.
9. Use a “Feelings Journal”
Encourage kids to write down or draw their feelings in a journal. Journaling helps them sort through their thoughts, reflect on what triggered their emotions, and think about how to respond next time.
We have journals for sale in digital version so you can download and print the worksheets at home and we offer a printed version too. These journals are designed specifically for youth.
10. Learn Problem-Solving Skills
Help kids understand that sometimes negative emotions come from problems they can solve. Teach them to identify the problem, think of possible solutions, and try one of them. Problem-solving can help them feel empowered and reduce feelings of frustration or helplessness.
11. Role-Playing Activities for Self-Control
Use role-play scenarios to help children practice managing their emotions in various social situations. These scenarios are effective ways to prepare them for real-life challenges.
Reflective Question
How do you model healthy emotional responses and emotional regulation for the children in your life?
Practical Strategies for Teaching Emotional Intelligence in Early Childhood
Creating a Supportive Environment
Establish a Safe Space for Emotional Expression
Children need a supportive environment where they feel safe expressing emotions without judgment. Encourage open communication by giving your child your full attention, validating their feelings, and offering guidance on handling emotions.
Encourage Family Members to Model EQ Skills
Family members play a significant role in developing a child’s EQ. When adults model empathy, effective communication, and emotional regulation, children learn these skills through observation and imitation.
Using Role-Playing and Group Activities
Use role-play to create scenarios where children practice empathy, patience, and self-control. Role-playing is a great way to reinforce interpersonal skills, such as waiting their turn, sharing, or asking for help.
Group Activities for Social Interactions
Organize activities that involve teamwork, which teaches children how to manage emotions in social interactions. This helps them practice problem-solving skills and handle the social complexities of interacting with peers.
Reflective Question
How can you use role-playing or group activities to teach children about emotions and social skills?
Building Empathy and Understanding the Feelings of Others
Encouraging Perspective-Taking
Teaching Children to Consider Others’ Feelings
Empathy is a crucial skill that helps children form stronger relationships. Ask questions like, “How would you feel if that happened to you?” or “How do you think your friend feels?” to help young children understand the emotions of others. If you have more than one child, I’m sure you will find ample opportunities to use this strategy amongst siblings.
Using Stories to Teach Empathy
Reading stories and discussing the characters’ emotions is a simple but effective way to build empathy. After reading, ask children to identify how a character might feel or respond in a situation. This helps children practice empathy and emotional awareness.
4 Bible Stories That Demonstrate Empathy
Here are some Bible stories that beautifully demonstrate empathy, showing compassion, understanding, and care for others:
The Good Samaritan (Luke 10:25-37)
- This parable is one of the most well-known examples of empathy. When a man is attacked by robbers and left injured by the side of the road, two individuals—a priest and a Levite—pass by without helping. However, a Samaritan, a member of a group often despised by Jews at the time, stops to help the injured man. He treats his wounds, takes him to an inn, and even covers his expenses. This story highlights true empathy, as the Samaritan sets aside societal prejudices to help someone in need.
Ruth and Naomi (Ruth 1:16-18)
- After the death of her husband and sons, Naomi encourages her daughters-in-law to return to their own families. However, Ruth refuses to leave Naomi alone, saying, “Where you go, I will go; where you stay, I will stay.” Ruth’s empathy and loyalty to Naomi lead her to leave her own family and join Naomi, supporting her through hardship. Ruth’s dedication highlights the power of empathy and loyalty.
Joseph Forgives His Brothers (Genesis 45:1-15)
- After being sold into slavery by his brothers, Joseph rises to a powerful position in Egypt. Years later, during a famine, his brothers come to Egypt seeking food. Instead of seeking revenge, Joseph shows empathy by forgiving them and providing for them and their families. Joseph’s understanding of his brothers’ regret and his willingness to help them reflects empathy and forgiveness
David and Jonathan’s Friendship (1 Samuel 18-20)
- Jonathan, King Saul’s son, empathizes deeply with David, who is struggling as his life is threatened by Saul. Although Jonathan’s loyalty to David risks his own inheritance and even his life, he supports David, helping him escape Saul’s wrath. Jonathan’s empathy and selfless friendship offer a beautiful example of caring for others, even at personal cost.
Reflective Question
How does fostering empathy in young children contribute to their ability to form positive relationships?
Teaching Emotional Vocabulary for Effective Communication
Children need the words to describe their feelings accurately to express themselves. Teaching emotional vocabulary is an essential skill for building emotional intelligence. Start with basic emotions like “happy,” “sad,” and “angry,” and gradually introduce more complex emotions like “frustrated” or “disappointed.”
Encourage children to use this vocabulary in daily life to talk about their feelings, which enhances effective communication and emotional competence.
Incorporating Emotional Vocabulary into Everyday Activities
During everyday life, like mealtime or play, ask questions about how your child is feeling. When they experience different emotions, encourage them to use their words, helping them become more comfortable expressing themselves.
Our self-esteem worksheets for children includes a guide to emotions and how to label them plus loads of other activities to help children calm down, build confidence and learn emotional intelligence. a guide to emotions and how to label them, plus loads of other activities to help children calm down, build confidence,
$3.99
15 Beginner Emotions For Children To Learn To Identify
- Happy – Feeling joy, contentment, or pleasure.
- Sad – Feeling sorrow, disappointment, or loss.
- Angry – Feeling frustration or irritation; often in response to unfair treatment.
- Excited – Feeling eager, enthusiastic, or full of anticipation.
- Scared – Feeling fear or anxiety, often in response to something unknown or perceived as dangerous.
- Surprised – Feeling astonishment or unexpected amazement.
- Embarrassed – Feeling self-conscious or uncomfortable, often from making a mistake or being the center of attention.
- Frustrated – Feeling upset or annoyed, often because of an obstacle or challenge.
- Confused – Feeling uncertain or mixed up, often due to not understanding something.
- Proud – Feeling satisfaction or happiness from one’s own accomplishments or those of others.
- Lonely – Feeling sad or isolated from others, often due to lack of companionship.
- Jealous – Feeling resentment or discomfort from wanting what someone else has.
- Grateful – Feeling thankful or appreciative for something or someone.
- Calm – Feeling peaceful and relaxed, with a sense of balance.
- Bored – Feeling uninterested or restless, often from a lack of engaging activity.
Teaching children to recognize and name these emotions gives them the language to express what they’re feeling, which is essential for building emotional intelligence and resilience.
Reflective Question
How can you make emotional vocabulary a part of your daily interactions with children?
Developing Problem-Solving Skills for Better Social Relationships
Problem-solving is essential for emotional intelligence and is particularly valuable for young children learning to navigate social situations. Teaching children to identify the problem, consider solutions, and make a choice helps them feel in control of their lives and prepares them for future success.
Developing problem-solving skills in children is essential for helping them navigate challenges independently, build resilience, and think critically. Here are some effective ways to foster these skills:
1. Encourage Them to Identify the Problem
Help children learn to recognize and clearly state the problem they’re facing. This is the first step in problem-solving, as it teaches them to pause and assess the situation. Encourage them to ask themselves, “What is the problem?” and “What do I need to solve it?”
2. Teach Brainstorming Techniques
Encourage kids to come up with multiple solutions to a problem. Show them that there’s often more than one way to handle a situation. Brainstorming also fosters creativity and helps them think outside the box.
3. Discuss Possible Outcomes
Teach children to consider the consequences of each possible solution. Ask questions like, “What might happen if we do this?” or “How would that make you or someone else feel?” This helps them evaluate solutions based on potential outcomes.
4. Practice Role-Playing Scenarios
Role-play common situations where problem-solving is needed, such as resolving conflicts with friends or handling a challenging homework question. Role-playing allows them to practice solutions in a safe, guided environment and gain confidence in their decision-making.
5. Encourage Them to Try Different Solutions
Teach children that not every solution will work on the first try, and that’s okay. Encouraging them to try different approaches helps them understand that problem-solving often requires flexibility and perseverance.
6. Model Problem-Solving in Daily Life
Let children observe you working through your own challenges, whether it’s fixing a household issue or resolving a misunderstanding. Verbalize your thought process and show them how you weigh options, take action, and adjust if needed.
7. Teach Emotional Regulation Techniques
Help children manage emotions like frustration or anger when facing a problem. Techniques like deep breathing, counting to ten, or taking a short break can help them stay calm and approach the situation with a clearer mind.
8. Praise Effort Over Results
Reinforce that the process of trying to solve a problem is more important than finding the perfect solution. Praise their effort and persistence, saying things like, “I love how you kept trying” or “You did a great job thinking of different ideas.”
9. Encourage Reflection After Solving a Problem
Once they’ve found a solution, ask children to reflect on what worked and what didn’t. Questions like, “What did you learn from this?” and “Would you do anything differently next time?” help them apply their experience to future challenges.
10. Incorporate Games and Puzzles
Games like puzzles, board games, and strategy games can improve children’s problem-solving skills in a fun way. These activities teach patience, planning, and creative thinking while keeping them engaged.
11. Encouraging Positive Self-Talk
Teach children to use positive self-talk when facing challenges. Statements like “I can try again next time,” “I can play with that later” or “I’m learning and growing” fosters resilience and a growth mindset.
By guiding children through these problem-solving steps, you equip them with essential skills that help them become more independent, resourceful, and resilient in the face of life’s challenges.
Reflective Question
How can teaching problem-solving skills at a young age help children handle conflicts in healthier ways?
The Benefits of High Emotional Intelligence for Academic and Life Success
High emotional intelligence is associated with academic success, better mental health, and positive social relationships. Studies have shown that children with higher emotional intelligence often perform better academically because they have developed emotional regulation and focus skills that help them succeed in school. Additionally, emotional intelligence helps children form healthy relationships, build self-confidence, and develop a strong sense of self-worth.
Building Strong Foundations for Academic Achievement
Emotional intelligence supports children’s ability to concentrate, handle stress, and navigate social situations at school. A strong foundation in emotional skills ultimately contributes to improved academic performance and a healthier approach to school life.
Preparing Children for Future Success
Emotional intelligence skills, such as empathy, emotional regulation, and effective communication, are essential life skills that children carry into their teenage years and adulthood. The development of emotional intelligence in early childhood sets children up for healthier interpersonal relationships, better problem-solving abilities, and future success.
Reflective Question
How does a focus on emotional intelligence in early childhood contribute to a child’s future well-being and success?
Conclusion
Teaching emotional intelligence in early childhood is an investment in a child’s overall well-being, supporting their ability to form positive relationships, achieve academic success, and develop essential life skills. By creating a supportive environment, encouraging emotional awareness, teaching problem-solving skills, and modeling empathy, parents and educators can help children build a strong foundation for emotional intelligence. Through these intentional practices, young children grow into emotionally intelligent individuals, better prepared for life’s ups and downs, and capable of building healthier, more fulfilling relationships.
What small changes can you make today to foster emotional intelligence in the children around you?
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References
Rafaeli, E., & Hiller, N. (2010). Emotional dependence: Theory, research, and clinical implications. Journal of Personality Assessment, 92(5), 452-463.